Confused

its rare for me to post something about love espesially my love life,so you're kinda lucky my dear reader lol =)
i have been thinking about this girl for i dont know how many days though....
all started when i met her at bsrc....then we chatted together,at that time i dont have any 'strange' feelings towards her though..
i started to feel something 'strange' after i knew she was the one who i met at the beach before i started my attachment at BSP..AND after i realized that i like the way she chat with me..i actually interested to know her since i met her at the beach..*blushed

i judge a girl from the way she chats with me...i know its kinda awkward..but thats the one of the methods i judge..
she's my friend's friend..so we just met though..she's actually my junior in school lol.Im not sure with myself...do i like her?
although i might interested to get closer with few girls at once...but this is totally different...
im beginning to feel she's filling up my mind gradually day by day...i even asked my friend whether she's in a relationship or not(i know...im not that optimistic in this sort of thing)

and i dont be flirty to sembarangan girls lah...i listened to this malay song titled
"merindu" by shah & man kidal featuring Ella
and i would think of her the moment i was listening to that sing..
okay perhaps i FALL for her but could'nt admit or convince myself that im involving myself with love thingy again..

its just that i've been hurt before..so im kinda traumatized with this sort of thing..ataupun to be exact im not confident..

okay,i'll tell you one of my stories lah ah...this girl said she does'nt want to couple with me because i am surrounded by many girls so i think she hesitates lah and think i would cheat on her by having scandals,,but the truth is i don't have that intention at all...i really liked her,i felt so down when i knew she has a new boyfriend after she broke up with her ex(which she told me she broke up with him for me and she told me it was'nt my fault...i kinda feel guilty for that guy though..but thank to God i did'nt couple with her fewh~)
but i did propose her that time(i wish i did'nt hehe),pasal i could'nt bear it that time...i really really liked her..and unfortunately,she said NO because she has a new boyfriend...i was feeling very sad + frustrated that time..i even hardly sleep that night..

so that's why im not confident in love thingy anymore...instead i would just wait for girls to confess to me first(i know its kinda terbalik..)
but now,i met a new girl...im slowly involving myself with love again..
i hope "pisang inda berbuah dua kali".....